Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Dealing With Singles
Sounds familiar, huh?
We've got the same problem in the Orthodox Jewish world. A greater % of the OJ population is single than in any other time in history. But Orthodox Judaism, like the LDS, is extremely marriage and family oriented. Your not a complete person until your married.
The problem is that your often treated as an incomplete person by everyone else. In my Shul, it's rare for a single to get an aliyah or to daven for the amud. I'm a Kohein, and I've been called up about half a dozen times since my Bar Mitzvah. (I'm not including aliyahs that were purchased on Yom Tov)
In another shul that I daven in, for years the Rabbi wouldn't let a single daven for amud on Shabbos except for Mincha.
I know the fear is that if we accommodate singles more, they'll lose their interest in getting married, that by treating them as children, incapable of making decisions for themselves, we encourage them to stop wasting time and get hitched.
While I have no interest in getting into the reasons for the singles crisis, I'm sure no one is going push marriage off further just because everyone else starts treating him like an equal.
In fact, creating areas where singles can be participants in the community probably could help the so-called crisis because it would make singles more visible.
Agree with that one... just the fact that a single (female) friend was here when another guy came over made him try and think of a guy for her. Exposure to the general public is a GOOD thing.